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For nine years Barbara Bickerstaffe’s life revolved around caring
for her husband, Bob. The couple was active and popular and
enjoyed activities such as hiking the Catskill Mountains before
tragedy struck.
Two years into the marriage, Barbara noticed something seemed
wrong with her husband.
“He paid the bills twice in the same month,“ Bickerstaffe said.
“Things were going on similar to that.” As time passed, Bob’s
forgetful symptoms grew progressively worse.
“One day he would be up, shaving, eating breakfast and the next
day he would forget how to do it all,” she said. Doctors eventually
diagnosed Bob with Lewy Body Dementia, a degenerative brain
disease that causes disruption of perception, thinking, and
behavior. In addition to the dementia, Bob suffered from seizures
and hallucinations.
Barbara sacrificed her life to make Bob’s remaining time
comfortable, “Our friends backed away, you become isolated,”
she recalled. “There is a real strong bond between the caregiver
and the person they care for. We grew so very close during this
whole thing, but there came a point when I could not take care of
him anymore because of his horrible hallucinations and seizures.”
While Barbara put all her energy into caring for her ailing
husband, she neglected her own well being. After years of putting
Bob’s needs first, Barbara realized it was time to put effort into her
own body, mind and spirit. “I knew that there is a lot of stress that
goes with being a caregiver, so I decided to do something about
that,” she said. “I had to take care of myself in order to take care
of Bob.”
In November 2005 Barbara joined Lifestyle Family Fitness’
Countryside location in Clearwater. She began doing
cardio and strength training. She lost some weight and
toned up – but has never measured her successes in
pounds and inches. To Bickerstaffe, whose life
became a roller coaster ride dealing with the
deterioration of her husband’s health, the best
part of joining Lifestyle Family Fitness was the
uplifted spirit she gained each time she visited
the club.
“Working out helped me have a totally different
outlook on life, spiritually, mentally and physically,” |
she said. “Before joining, I felt very isolated and at Lifestyle, there
were a lot of positive things around me. It is so important for
caregivers to have an outlet and I can’t think of a better place to
do it than in a gym.”
In February 2006, Robert Bickerstaffe passed away at the age of
78. Over the past year, Barbara has continued her workout
regimen. She has a new found love for boxing. “I started boxing
and that has been absolutely phenomenal. It helps my cardio and
gives me a self - esteem lift,” she said. “It makes me feel like I am
accomplishing something.”
She now shares her passion for fitness with family. Her three
children are taking a new interest in health and fitness. In fact,
after a family visit to Lifestyle Family Fitness, her son Gordon Hudak became a member of the Apopka club. He is now making
strides to lose weight and live a healthy lifestyle.
Bickerstaffe thinks wistfully about her late husband. “We had a lot
of memories, he was a good guy,” Bickerstaffe said.” I don’t
know what I would have done without Lifestyle Family Fitness this
past year. When you lose someone so close to you, a part of you
is gone. Lifestyle Family Fitness sort of filled that void for me.”
written by Wendy Friedman |